4 Dec - "What happened to all the celestial fire?"

Don Juan DeMarco (1994)

dir. Jeremy Leven

CAST
Marlon Brando (A Streetcar Named Desire, 1951)
Johnny Depp (Rango (voice), 2011)
Bob Dishy (Jungle 2 Jungle, 1997)
Rachel Ticotin (Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, 2008)
Stephen Singer (The Happening, 2008)
Faye Dunaway (The Rules of Attraction, 2002)
Tommy 'Tiny' Lister (The Fifth Element, 1997)
Tom Mardirosian (Lady in the Water, 2006)

This is one of those relative reality movies like Big Fish or The King of California (now that was a good movie). Our hero Don Juan, played by Johnny Depp, is probably crazy, but he also has these occasional moments of self awareness that suggest he consciously prefers the illusion to the reality, and then of course there's little snags that suggest the merest possibility that he's actually telling the truth, but no, that would be impossible. So this guy Don Juan, who dresses like Zorro, has to undergo a ten day psychological evaluation to determine if he will be committed. His psychiatrist is  retiring in exactly ten days, and is determined that Don Juan should be cured in that time. The primary narrative focus is Don Juan's self-reported life story, his sexual exploits and the loss of his one true love. We also get a sub plot of Marlon Brando's character battling with his own life's expectations and making a mad grab at the sense of drama and romanticism that Don Juan represents. I guess the point is that life is what you make it, and if you are unhappy with reality as it is working out, just do something different.

11 Jan - "He doesn't have a name so death can't find him!"

Waterworld (1995)

dir. Kevin Reynolds (Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves, 1991)

CAST
Kevin Costner (JFK, 1991)
Jeanne Tripplehorn (Big Love (TV), 2006-2011)
Tina Majorino (Napoleon Dynamite, 2004)
Dennis Hopper (Choke, 2001)
Jack Black (King Kong, 2005)

Robert LaSardon (Bubble Boy, 2001)

My brother says that Waterworld is a knock-off on Mad Max. To that I say, I never really cared for Mad Max anyway, but I DO like Waterworld, even though it's commonly referred to as the worst movie ever conceived. And to be sure, there are an awful lot of plot holes, like how all that contemporary stuff remains preserved on the surface of the water for thousands of years. And the whole "Smoker" culture seems terribly unsustainable. I mean - imagine a whole world utterly devoid of natural resources besides fishies and dirt derived from decomposing bodies. There shouldn't be any wood, there shouldn't be any metal. None of it makes sense and certainly they can't be affording to decimate the scant stuff they've got at the rate that occurs in this movie.

Kevin Costner is a particularly dull actor. Really, he can pretty much suck the emotional reaction out of any scene. Waterworld isn't awesome because of the acting, although I think Dennis Hopper does a fine job, it's because of the crazy atmosphere and the technical scenes of sails unfurling and gears grinding. Waterworld = what a whacky place!

11 Jan- "In your face, camel cake!"

Hook (1991)
dir. Steven Spielberg (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, 2008)

CAST
Dustin Hoffman (Tootsie, 1982)
Robin Williams (Flubber, 1997)
Julia Roberts (Eat Pray Love, 2010)
Bob Hoskins (Who Framed Roger Rabbit, 1988)
Maggie Smith (Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, 2009)
Dante Basco (But I'm a Cheerleader, 1999)
Gwyneth Paltrow (The Royal Tenenbaums, 2001)

This movie is one of my childhood favorites for unclear reasons. It certainly isn't because of Robin William's stellar performance as either a workaholic father or a whimsical and cocksure Peter Pan. Another paradox is why I've fostered a lifelong obsession with Dante Basco, because I don't really think he deserves it (These days he does a lot of voice work for the Disney channel, including Avatar: The Last Airbender, and American Dragon: Jake Long). He was also really unconvincingly gay in the cult comedy But I'm a Cheerleader (1999). He was also in one of those inner-city kids dancing movies with Antonio Banderas.

On the other hand, I will go to my grave insisting that Dustin Hoffman gives the best performance of his career as Captain Hook. While Peter's character is derivative and formulaic, Capt. Hook is so awesomely insane and narcissistic. Maybe this is a little sick, but my favorite scene is where he threatens to kill himself and he's holding the gun to his head and he says "Don't stop me Smee! Smee, stop me. Stop me Smee!" Such high drama!

Here's a little something extra I learned - there's a scene where a man and a woman are kissing on a bridge: that's George Lucas and Carrie Fisher, wild huh?